It is doubtful you will ever find a professional literary critic's view on one of my books, or on any of the many articles and short stories I write. Simply put, that is because I, for the most part, have no love for professional critics — not that to my knowledge they have ever written anything bad about me or done me down, but I deliberately never submit my work to them as a matter of principle, and unlike many others I would never pay for a kind review.

 

I see professional critics as (all too often) egoists trying to make a name for themselves (and sometimes large sums of money too!) on the back of other people's hard work. The appreciation of another's efforts is largely subjective. So as one man's meat can be another man's poison, they attempt to perform a task that is utterly impossible to do fairly, and in being unable to achieve that goal they will often "re-write" a book or a play according to some "hidden" meaning they claim to have "discovered" in it in order to be controversial, and to gain some readers and kudos for themselves. To just say they found something was good (or bad) to a certain degree does nothing to get the critic's name noticed, does it?

 

Of course there will undoubtedly be many critics who are good at their job, and who will genuinely read the story the author has written and pass judgement on that — the storyline and the quality of writing — but with so many "strange" ones out there today, who is to know who they are? As hard as it is for an author to find a good one — and one who isn't looking for vast sums of money in order to read the book supplied free to them before saying a few kind words about it — it is even harder for the public to know one. To my mind a bought review is absolutely meaningless, and although commonly found I would say it borders on the deceitful, whilst some of the others can be just plain weird. Today you can find the weirdest of write-ups appearing in some of the most prestigious newspapers and magazines — it is all totally confusing to both author and reader alike.

 

As an example I give you: US critic Michael Bronski who claims to have "discovered" that the Harry Potter books might be based on a hidden gay agenda, even going so far as to suggest our hero could be gay. He tells us: "So much of the basic Potter plot is identical to the traditional coming-out story." Yeah? Really? Well, I question that — and with all the many and diverse LGBT undertakings I've been involved with in my lifetime, I'm a gay man who would know! The innuendos this critic has found, even were they to be intentional, could equally apply to any sexual persuasion — so why has he plumped for gay? Only because gay is always fashionable, and is sure to get you noticed?

 

 JK Rowling is reported as being astonished by Bronski's ideas. So am I. Fortunately her books are good enough to speak for themselves and continue to sell like hot-cakes in a children’s market where — although it shouldn't matter we have to face facts: it unquestionably would matter — a juvenile gay hero would never enjoy quite the same great sales.

 

Hot on the heels of Bronski's revelations, critics all around the world have either run with the same theme or they have debated it. Johann Hari, to mention just one other critic, has put his two-pennyworth in on the exact same lines quite dramatically. Er . . . Wouldn't a review of what JK Rowling actually penned have been far more relevant to any reader yearning for some information on the book? It has become so bad today that many of these "critics" are now going back in time to dissect Enid Blyton's books, and guess what? Yes, they've “discovered” a hidden gay agenda in them too! Can you believe that?

 

I have no wish to supply such people with a free copy of anything I have written so that they may pontificate and ask: “What is the author trying to tell us?” Crap! Unless the author lives in some repressed country or state he or she is unlikely to be hiding anything more meaningful in their writing than perhaps a few clues relevant to the story. But no, there are always some who will look for a hidden political, sexual, racial, or religious agenda — something that will be sure to get them noticed — and when it’s not there, they’ll still try to convince you it is. 

 

In my mind there are far too many good books, plays, films and the suchlike that never receive a fair chance because some "professional critic" with their own personal motivations and ideals has panned them. Remember Barrymore's comeback? I had a close friend there who swears the audience loved the show, and that they wanted more, but the very next day in the newspapers the critics mostly crucified the man, destroying him and causing him to flee the country. Who had the hidden agenda there?

 

I believe professional reviews can too often be totally misleading. The cost of a book, or the admittance fee to a play or a film, is not usually an enormous amount of money. It is a small price to pay in order to be able to make up your own mind on its worth. Employing this philosophy, I have been pleasantly surprised many, many times.

 

Fortunately I don't write for the professional critics, as I don't write for a living. Perhaps if I did I might be forced to change my views. But I don't. I write for my own enjoyment, and for the enjoyment of all those people — and they number quite a few now — who have discovered me and like what it is I offer them. Neither do I traipse the world doing book signings — I'm a bit too long in the tooth for that these days, so I only do a few near to home. However I do appreciate that some people value a signed book, and so anyone sending me a copy (or ordering one directly through me) with the return postage and with the dedication exactly as they would wish it to be written clearly stated, I am happy to oblige.

 

I am also grateful for the numerous emails that I receive. I treasure them all, for to me these are my real critics and reviewers — the many people who with their hard-earned money buy my books or who take the time and the effort to seek out my short stories and articles. It is only of those reviews that I take any note. Just a few of them may be read here.

 

A Grumpy Old Man?  Well, perhaps I am — but it's a lot of fun! When you get to a certain age you don't have to be anybody but who you want to be! May you all get there someday and be able to enjoy that too! Be lucky!

 

 

 

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